I am sure some desi(people from India/Pak) guys like me have come to such a point in life where they had to decide if they should marry an american girl or not. I want to shed some light on this.
I have a habit of explaining things from scratch.
To start with, I have a strong beleif in nature. I think nature has its own way of balancing things. I try to flow with it as much as i can. Having said that, nature has given a role to a man and a woman. It can be seen in all species and not just humans. Even in a jungle, the lion is the king and he is served by the lionness(s). The male has always been the driver of things whereas the woman has been its support (an important one). We can imagine it like a Captain and First Officer pair in the cockpit. First officer has its own importance but he is not meant to sit in the left seat(Captain's). His role is that of supporting the Captain and assist him. Imagine what would happen if they switch sides. First Officer demands command and Captain becomes his subordinate for the flight. This is a recipe for disaster. It is the nature of things to have ultimate authority given to one entity. It can never be equal, or balanced. Thats not how the world works. In a car, we always have steering on one side, not on both sides, or not in the centre. There is One driver. Now imagine two people driving the car. The other person sitting in the front seat demanding she has equal rights and needs control. Thats okay, she can play with the gears but when we get to a point where decisions have to be made in split seconds, whether to slow down or speed up, whether to change lane or not, or like during merging, we need one authority. No equal roles. But women have made it a point to drive the car sitting in front passenger's seat. Needless to say, the car and its passengers wont have a safe journey.
And this is exactly what is happening to our world right now.
With the Increase in "Independent Woman" movement, inspired by the society, who want equality, we see a growing number of women demanding to sit in the Captain's seat. And this, can be seen in most of the American girls. With increasing Americanization of India, Indian girls are getting there, but still a lot of them do follow the gender roles as assigned.
Now what has their independence movement fetched them? In that context, there are two types of people. Married and Unmarried.
In case of married couples, women tame their husbands, or atleast try to. This leads to men living like rats. For example, my colleagues dont spend the money on the beer through their regular credit card as they are afraid their wives would notice that and object their joint money being spent on the male's pleasure. They have separate hidden accounts. This is just an example. Its deeply rooted in their daily lives. One of my colleagues started coming to work early and leave late. I asked him why and he said that his wife wanted to go for an expensive cruise and he didnt have that much money to contribute to it so he opted out and she went there with her friends(male and female both). Just drifting away from the point, this is another malice in american society. The couple live together but still have separation of finances. If husband makes $5000 and wife makes $7000, they both still contribute $1000 per month in the joint account which i feel is absurd. In their case its always 'you' and 'me'. Its never 'us'. Marriage should be an absolute union, and here it looks like a business deal. This topic is for another day.
In case of unmarried girls, there is nothing left to explain as its quite open. You see lot of teenage moms walking down the streets in America. They 'think' that they are self sufficient and can handle everything but its very clear that its just the opposite. They get screwed by guys up until the decline of their adulthood. Initially they are those easy stupid dumb girls who can be easily talked into things and being used and later on they take the role of cougars. And once their kids are above 18, they leave home and these girls are left to fend for themselves. I see a lot of them. Depressed souls. But they 'thought' they could do it all alone, and they have failed miserably. I am not talking about exceptions but I know for sure a lot of men would cherish the idea of a wife who takes good care of the house and children and supports her husband rather than nagging him all day and trying to control. But they dont like this arrangement, they want independence.
I am a good specimen of kashmiri masulinity and have dated many types of women(fat,hot,cute,ugly,beautiful) and have good experience dealing with white caucasian women. I can tell you that unless you are someone who wants to let your wife run the show and be genuinely okay with it, american women are not for you. Yes there are exceptions, i have seen very intelligent women too who embrace the support role and are a delight to be with but they are rare. We do get tempted by looking at their blushing skin, atleast i do. On a beauty scale i rate them extremely higher than other races. I love blonde women, but, only in bed. I have made it a point of not getting involved emotionally with them unless i am very sure about them. And so far they seem to be very consistent about their bitchy image. I am off the dating scene now, i have girls i can call and have sex with at my apartment but i think its a waste of time and energy now. So i am seriously looking for an arranged marriage with an Indian(india raised) girl.
Another important point that i want to make is about the concept of horoscope matching, which is non existent in america. But thats a large topic and i will write on that some other day but let me just give u a brief idea about it. In India divorce rate is less than 1%, and in america its 50%. So by looking at it one might think that its about the culture and the open society etc-. Yes that is a factor but can somebody explain why do muslims, who are the most conservative race on earth, have divorce rate of 30%. The answer is horoscope matching. The concept is simple. Why does one divorce? Because he cannot stand the other person. If we match the horoscopes before marriage, we can get a good idea about the planets ruling the native so if there is harmony there then fights would be minimum and the flow would be smooth. Americans and Muslims dont follow horoscope matching, so its a hit and trial thing for them. They cannot stand the other person and decide to part ways. Indian horoscope matching is a valuable tool. Use It. I have taken the birth details of all the girls i know and i have matched them with mine, and the result is so very accurate. The girls i get along very well with match well with me and those who dont, it shows in the result. This topic is for some other day.
Therefore, my conclusion is, you may be tempted to marry that nice butt beautiful blonde, but dont do it unless you are absolutely sure. I was saved by jumping into it and i am so grateful that i didnt marry her, my life would have been a living hell. Kutti haramzadi.
I am not saying that Indian women are goddess, but your life will be comparatively smoother. So think before you jump. I did, and i am happy now, than the dude who married her.
Yes i totally understand that the current situation of many desis dont permit Indian imported girls and you may be tempted to do it for the right to live in america but there are a lot of girls out there and you should do it genuinely with one. Doing it with whites just to get your papers and then leaving them is something i condemn strongly. Take your time, there are millions of girls out there. If you try you can get one whom u genuinely like. Dont do it with the intention of leaving them once you get your green card.
Finally, i would like to say that girls are girls. They are unpredictable. The above analysis is probabilitic is nature. for example 20% of american chicks are good to marry a desi guy as compared to 70% of desi girls but in the end you are going to marry only 1 girl. So make sure she is the one from the right group of girls, race doesnt matter.
i_am_neha_arora2@yahoo.ca (fake account ofcourse)
